i recently started dating someone. nothing serious, just waiting to see where God may take it. we clicked well and being of the opposite sex, it just seemed to be the right thing to do. so we shared our intentions, found they were the same, and like some cheesy magic wand had been waved, we were dating.

as of last night i am not so sure of that anymore. i don't know if she is quite sure what she wants. we've only known each other for a few short weeks, so there aren't intense feelings or much of a level of commitment, but the idea of ending it before we can even really see where God has taken it is still disappointing. to top it off, as if that wasn't enough, while talking with a good friend about it last night i allowed myself to be brutally honest in my disappointment. my honesty prompted my friend to get upset and hang up the phone on me. not particularly the best way to go about feeling better.

i spent much of the night wide awake, tossing and turning. a habit i've perfected in times of stress. the one thing i had completely decided was that i wouldn't continue the similar habit i have, where i tend to ignore my breakfasts with God when things don't seem to be going well. so this morning after pulling myself from bed i drove over to my new house, sat down in the back yard at my new table and chair set, opened my Bible and journal, and began getting to work on my time with Him.

it wasn't long before i noticed one of my new neighbors working in his yard. i had met this neighbor a couple days earlier when he and his "schnookums" came over to greet me while i was working on my house. it was easy to see that they were both slow. but it was just as easy to see that they had hearts of gold. my neighbor said to me, "i heard you're going to be teaching kids about Jesus." i said that was what i do for a living to which he simply asked, "can i join the class?"

this morning i said hi and we talked a bit about the flowers in my back yard, the work to be done on my house (he wants to help me carry my trash bags to the curb) and finally he asked me how i was doing. i found myself giving the standard, "i'm doing great" answer despite knowing deep down that it simply wasn't true.

i asked him how he was doing and he said, "i'm in a great mood this morning!" he then went on to explain that he talked to his step mother who gave him some "great advice." he was very excited that he was already beginning to take her advice, and he would now drink a glass of metamucil every day.

as he headed back into his house it occurred to me how the simplest blessings can often be some of the best. here i was sitting in a beautiful back yard that God has blessed me with. in a home that i never would have thought could be mine, doing what i love more than anything (and actually getting paid for it!). and yet i was sitting there feeling sorry for myself.

my neighbor may not be the a child, but in his world, he's learned to have faith like a child. something i could certainly stand to learn about. and this theme that seems to be coming up quite frequently lately. perhaps being "grown up" simply isn't all its cracked up to be.